"If your fellow believer sins against you, go and tell him in private what he did wrong. If he listens to you, you have helped that person to be your brother or sister again."
Matthew 18:15
Have you ever had someone tell other people how you offended them? How did that make you feel? Instead of coming to you, the "offense" became exaggerated and spread. Then you wonder why people treat you differently or stop interacting with you altogether.
I had offended one of my classmates without realizing it. After school, he came up to me and asked " Can we talk for a bit?". We walked and talked about what I had done and how he had been offended. I had no idea, but was grateful for our talk and the chance to apologize. Think about it for a moment. Do we go to the person who has offended or hurt us to talk it out? Or do we get ticked off, yell, shout, or, worse yet, voice our case to the court of public opinion?
Look at the words of Christ, "got and tell him in private." Don't come at them with guns blazing seeking to demean them, belittle them, or crush them. Go with gentleness with these words, "Got a minute?" Permit me to provide a touch of insight...Attitude Is The Key To Discussion. Let me explain, if my attitude is one of kindness, gentleness, and humility, the situation is more likely to get resolved quickly and the relationship built stronger for that honesty. However, if my attitude is one of defensiveness, things will quickly become hostile and that relationship will be destroyed.
When we allow Abba to be our focus, we truly can be humble and restorative.
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