It's A Struggle~

"Let all bitterness and wrath and anger and clamor 

and slander be put away from you, along with all malice."

Ephesians 4:31

 I've been struggling of late.  An event occurred in my family over Christmas which brought back to my mind a lot of negative memories from my past.  The more I remembered, the angrier I became.  I know in my heart of hearts that I cannot change anything in the past.  I also know in my heart of hearts that holding onto my anger and resentment is not only sinful, but it also destroys my joy.  This I openly confess: I've been angry and resentful about things I can not change or alter.

Having said that, Abba has reminded me, in His ever so gentle poke between my eyes, that the reason I entertained the anger and resentment was due to my own lack of faith!  In my own weakness, I listened to the whispers of the enemy.  You see, that is one of the ways our enemy works...waits until we are weak and then whispers to us to "remember when...?".

When Oliver Cromwell died and the monarchy was restored, the powers that be were so angry with Cromwell that they supposedly had his corpse exhumed, had it whipped, hung and beheaded.  Why do this to something that was already dead?  The same reason I brought to my own mind those "corpses" of past events...namely because I wanted to. It's just that plain and simple.  I listened to the one who does NOT have my best interests in mind and wants to keep my focus off of the ONE who does.  And I fell right into that pit.

Therefore, I am learning and will continue to learn to leave the past in the past.  Let it go!!!  Turn EVERYTHING over to Abba, and let Him deal with it!